Wednesday, January 31, 2007

News for those of us without cable - no Jon Stewart.

Since I don't get cable, I suffer for lack of news. Except on U-tube, I have NEVER SEEN JON STEWART!

So where do I get reliable news? We all know that there is none on the major channels -- but wait! Stay up. There is still Jay Leno!

So tonight he gives us the news from England. For the first time, in England a cat has been diagnosed with depression. The cat was put on Prozac.

While I'm sure this is real news, How did they know? How can you tell a cat has depression? They sleep all day? Then can't sleep at night? They get irritible if you move their cat bowl? How could you tell a cat was depressed? Perhaps the cat realized that some of us do not consider them to be Gods anymore?

Oh, wait. How could they tell we no longer consider them Gods? We don't stroke them when they jump into our lap and demand it? We don't buy them catnip mice, and perhaps we force them to go chase real mice? I don't believe it. Any cat who purrs can get his head scratched or back stroked upon with a short, demanding purr. Any cat who poos in the middle of my bed can get his litter changed upon demand. They ALL know this. They learn it as kittens.

The news, then, must be that someone has learned how to diagnose depression in cats. Don't tell me how to tell. My cat already has total control in this household. Even the dogs agree.

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